Summer 1999

Psychologist Explores Intriguing World of "Pretend Friends"

Vivid Imaginings Play a Role in Early Development

How would you feel if your child started talking to somebody who doesn’t physically exist?

Some parents delight in their child’s imaginary companion as evidence of a lively imagination and creative mind. Others worry that the imaginary companion might be a sign that their child is in emotional distress or having difficulty communicating with other children.

"In the past a child with an imaginary companion might have been considered peculiar, shy, or even troubled," says Marjorie Taylor, a professor of psychology at the University of Oregon who has studied children and their pretend friends for ten years. "The reality is much more positive–and interesting."

She notes that imaginary companions are surprisingly common; more than half of all children have them. The youngsters who create pretend friends tend to be less shy than their peers. They are also better able to focus their attention and to see things from another person’s perspective.

"The research on imaginary companions suggests that pretend friends may be created to serve a variety of emotional needs, including a desire for companionship, a way to work through fears, or a method of dealing with actual or perceived restrictions," she says.

Taylor’s research in this area began by contacting 152 randomly selected families with children in the three- to four-year-old age group–a common age for children to have pretend friends. She interviewed both children and parents, asking questions such as whether the child had an imaginary companion, and if so, what it was like. She conducted follow-up interviews, again with both parents and children, three years later.

This research provides the framework for her new book on the subject, Imaginary Companions and the Children Who Create Them (Oxford University Press, 1999).

"An active imagination is an important resource for children. An imaginary companion is evidence of its development–and as such is a positive indicator of psychological growth. In addition, a pretend friend can be an especially useful window through which parents can gain new insights about their children’s thoughts and feelings."

She explains that while children sometimes have difficulty assessing the reality of Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, or characters on television, they generally have a very good grasp of the make-believe nature of their imagined friends.

Taylor is currently extending her research into other areas. One project is a cross-cultural study of parents’ attitudes toward children’s fantasy behaviors, including activities involving imaginary companions. The study will focus on parents in Oregon, Mexico City, and San Francisco’s Chinese-American community.

In another study, Taylor is working with adults to better understand the long-term effects of having an imaginary companion as a child. To explore this question, Taylor and her colleagues have interviewed and psychologically tested adults, some of whom had pretend friends, some of whom did not.

"Our preliminary results seem to indicate that those adults who had imaginary companions as children tend to be more open to new experience."

Taylor reflects that while much of her work is with children, imagination plays an important role throughout life. By learning about children, we are learning about adults as well, she says.

"I am interested in the nature of the human mind," Taylor states. "Our imagination distinguishes us from other species. We use it to plan, to remember, to entertain, to get us through tough times. Research investigating the emergence of imagination in childhood, as well as investigating activities in later life, will help us more fully understand the human experience."

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